Chapter 37

Getting Along With God's People

Romans 12:9-16

 

So how's your G.A.W.O.P.?  You know, your G.A.W.O.P.?  Your Gawop.  How are you Getting Along With Other People, your G.A.W.O.P.?

 

The Bible is not just a book to be learned, it's a book to be lived.  And in Romans 12, Paul explains that God's will is for us to, not be shaped by the world, but to changed, made new from the inside out, transformed by the Word of God.  And one of the ways that the Word changes us has to do with getting along with other people.

 

So how are you doing in that area?  How's your marriage relationship?  How is it at your house?  How are you getting along with your parents? your children? your brothers and sisters?  How are your relationships doing at work or at school?  How are things right now between you and your friends?  your neighbors?  your boss?  your teachers?  your employees?  your customers?  Got any enemies?  How have you been getting along with other people?

 

That's what I want to talk to you about today.  But really, I'm not interested in speaking to you on a strictly human level.  What I have in mind is supernatural living!  Living that goes beyond our natural ability, it cannot be learned, it cannot be imitated.  It is supernatural.  It comes from above.  It comes from God.  It is the powerful Word of God and the power of the Holy Spirit that is changing your life and enabling you to relate to all those other people in your life in a new and unusual and supernatural way.

 

Personal relationships are the most problematic, most painful parts of our lives.  I way be frustrated with my broken furnace or aggravated with broken automobile, but a broken relationship, that's what sends people to the counselor's couch, that's what causes us to cry ourselves to sleep at night.  At the same time, personal relationship are the most thrilling and fulfilling parts of our lives as well.  That is where we find the most joy and satisfaction. 

 

Romans 12:9-21 is all about relationships.  Talk about commands!  In these 13 verses there are 30 commandments!  (And you thought there were only 10).  30 things that the Bible tells us to do or not to do with regard to our relationships with other people.  They come at us in an unexplained, rapid fire list.  They don't need a lengthy explanation, they just need to be heard and obeyed.

 

These 30 commandments fall into three basic categories.  Verses 10-16 are about our family relationships.  The family to which Paul is referring is, not your blood relatives, but the family of God, that is, your relationship with your brothers and sisters in Christ, your relationship with people in the church.  There are several "one another's" in this section (2x in v. 10 also v. 16).  One another is usually a phrase reserved for the fellowship of believers, the church.  Paul also uses phrases like "brotherly love" (v. 10) and "the saints" (v. 13).  So this section has to do with our relationships within the Christian community.

 

The second category of relationships is found in verses 17-18.  Here the emphasis is on the general public.  In both verses, Paul uses the phrase "all men."  We're not just thinking about Christians now.  This has to do with your relationship with the general public - your co-workers, your neighbors, etc.

 

The third category of relationship is found in verses 19-21.  Here the emphasis is on your enemies.  In fact, verse 20 says "thine enemy."

 

So what we have here is a list of commands regarding how God expects us to get along with each other, with the general public and with our enemies.

 

But I left out verse 9.  This verse, the place where it all begins, is verse 9.  You see, verse 9 covers all relationships - your Christian family, the general public and even your enemies.

 

 

How To Treat Everyone, v. 9.

 

Authentic love.  "Let love be without dissimulation."  In other words, our love is to be without hypocrisy.  It is to be sincere.  It is to be authentic, genuine, real.  We can fake love.  We can say we love, but Paul is calling us to genuine love for people.  Jesus said that loving one's neighbor is the second greatest commandment, just behind loving God, Matthew 22:39.  He told us all men would know that we were His disciples if we had love one for another, John 13:35.  Jesus even commanded us to love our enemies, Matthew 5:44!  We are to love each other, to love our neighbors, to love our enemies.  The greatest of all the Christian graces is love, I Corinthians 13:13.  And here, the emphasis is that our love must be authentic, genuine and real.

 

Balanced Love.  "Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good."  There is, at times, a point of tension between righteousness and love.  There are those who tell us that if we truly love someone we will accept their sin.  Example: The homosexual says, "If you love me, you must accept my homosexual behavior."  But the very verse that tells us to love genuinely also tells us to hate evil and to cling to good.  Real love must be balanced with righteousness.  There is no tension, no conflict, between the two.  We love people, but we hate sin that destroys lives and error that leads people to hell.  You don't have to forsake God's righteous standards in order to love and care about people. 

 

This is the basis on which we relate to all people.  We love them genuinely and we balance that love with righteousness.

 

 

How To Treat The Family, vv. 10-16.

Between verses 10 and 16, there are a list of __ specific ways which we should treat our fellow Christians.

 

1. V. 10a - Graciousness.  "Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love."  These words are full of affection and kindness and devotion and fondness.  We might just sum it up with the idea of just being gracious to the family.  (Often we are more gracious to strangers than we are to each other.)  Simple kindness and courtesy will revolutionize your relationships. 

 

2.  V. 10b - Unselfishness.  "In honour preferring one another."  We are told here to give preference to one another in honor.  Instead of always trying to manipulate things so that they come out your way, you should be unselfish and make an intentional effort to prefer their way. 

 

3.  V. 11 - Enthusiastic.  "Not slothful in business; fervent in spirit; serving the Lord."  The word "business" is not talking about your secular financial dealings.  It has to do with your relationship with other Christians, that you are not to be lazy or slothful when to comes to exercising your spiritual gifts.  We must do it fervently, as to the Lord.  Ecclesiastes 9:10  Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might.  Your relationships with Christians needs the kind of effort and enthusiasm you put into your hobbies and pass times.

 

4.  V. 12a - Hopefulness.  "Rejoicing in hope."  We use the word hope to express desire.  "I hope this will happen."  That definition carries with it the possibility of uncertainty.    "I hope it will happen but who knows, it might not."  But that idea is not the kind of hope being expressed here.  This hope is the expectation and anticipation.  It is the opposite of hopelessness.  Hopeless means that it is not going to happen.  Hopeful means that indeed it is going to happen.  Life makes us weary and we've got to help each other by rejoicing in hope, that is, the wonderful anticipation that our future holds.  I Corinthians 15:58  Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye steadfast, unmoveable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labour is not in vain in the Lord.

 

5.  V. 12b - Consistency.  "Patient in tribulation."  Sometimes even Christians are difficult to get along with.

 

To live above with saints we love

will certainly be glory

To live below with saints we know

well, that's another story!

 

Supernatural living requires us to persevere in the midst of adversity and trials, to not give up on the relationship, to keep building bridges and tearing down walls, to be patient through tribulations.

 

6.  V. 12c - Prayerfulness.  "Continuing instant in prayer."  One of the best things you can do for another Christian is to just constantly and consistently pray for them.  "Pray one for another" (James 5).  This is what is known as intercessions.  Paul told Timothy that intercessions were to made for others.  On another occasion he said, "Brethren, pray for us."

 

7.  V. 13a - Generosity.  "Distributing to the necessity of saints."  Christians are responsible to help meet the needs fellow believers might have. 

 

8.  V. 13b - Hospitable.  "Given to hospitality."  The word hospitality literally means "the love of strangers."  We tend to be a lot more generous and open to our friends.  But in the Christian community we cannot ignore or slight needy Christians whom we may not know as well.  Hebrews 13:2  Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares, also III John 5-8.

 

9.  V. 14 - Disarming.  "Bless them which persecute you: bless, and curse not."  Our natural instinct is to bless those who bless us and curse those who curse us.  But God's Word calls here, not for a natural reaction but for a supernatural response.  To return a curse with a blessing.  This has a way of being very disarming.  You've got two buckets in your hands.  One has gasoline in it and the other has water in it.  When you encounter a fire, you have a choice about which bucket you will use. 

 

10.  V. 15 - Compassion.  "Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep." Christian fellowship is more than just a pat on the back and a friendly handshake.  It means sharing the blessings and burdens of others so that we all grow together.

 

11.  V. 16a - Impartiality.  "Be of the same mind one toward another."  Paul is not asking here for uniformity but for unanimity.  We are to make allowances for each other and treat everyone the same.  James 2:9  But if ye have respect to persons, ye commit sin.  Jesus set the example for us in this area.  He treated the immoral woman at the well with the same courtesy that He treated educated and polished Nicodemus.  He was as charitable to the dying thief as He was to His own mother.  He was a patient with Judas as He was with Peter.

 

12.  V. 16b - Humility.  "Mind not high things, but condescend to men of low estate. Be not wise in your own conceits."  Don't spend your life pursuing high things but pursuing low men.  Shun pride.

 

We are to treat everyone with genuine love balanced with righteousness.  We are specifically to treat our fellow Christians with graciousness, unselfishness, enthusiasm ,hopeful consistency, prayerfulness, generosity, hospitality, disarming compassion, impartiality and humility.

 

Next time, we will concentrate on the other two categories of relationship - the general public and our enemies.  But even the list that we have just worked our way through cannot help but bring conviction into our lives.  Repent of your failures in these areas and walk in the Spirit so that you will see the working out of these supernatural precepts in your life to a greater and greater extent.  Where we see success, let us give thanks.  Where we see failure, let us ask for supernatural help.